It was not the money, but it was other thing...

They was one time, that I tell my friend, what is the thing I want when I am rich or when I get the first salary from my job. I told him that I want a big TV or a full set of home theater so that I can enjoy watching my favorite movies. But now, I realize that, it is not the money that I need to enjoy watching movies, and also it is not the big screen that I need to fully experience the story, actually it was the time that I needed to spend to watch those movies.

It happens just a moment ago, which I watch one of the movie of my favorite for the second time. After I finished that movies, I felt really satisfied. And I tell to myself, this is the real thing that I want. It doesn't matter how big is my TV, how good the sound is, but it is more to the feeling itself. I suspected that, I never get this feeling maybe because I don't really have much time to spend for myself, until I clear up my mind and let it settle down. I do have free time obviously, but those time wasn't really free. Although it seems like my time is free, but my mind never be free. It keep processing like a "Busy State". It can't be control though.

Then it comes to new subject, controlling my mind. I had learnt from the ideology of "The Secret " that tells me, to control our mind is actually by controlling our feeling. It can be explain as below;

A good (positive) mind comes from a good/positive feeling.

Example of good feeling : Happy, grateful, feeling enough, satisfy, feel healthiness

Oppositely, a bad (negative) mind comes from a bad/negative feeling.

Example of bad feeling : Sad, angry, dissatisfy, jealous, bad temper, never feeling enough, etc..

So, I do believe in this ideology which I practice it. Even sometime I create it or acting like it, even I'm not. (Maybe some of my friends recognize it, huhu..) But that is not all. I also try to control my thinking for other reasons. In put it in my academics, relationships, family and most of it for my faith to Allah.

Lately, I also like to control my mind before i'm going to sleep. Ya, you know, some of the studies showed us that, before we are going to sleep, our mind will become like "uncontrol" state of mind, or people might say, "Minda separa sedar" (xingat ape nama dia dlm english, huhu ). People also had said that, it is a good time for someone to memorize something in this state of mind. So, since few months ago, I started this habit. I must listen to any music to control my mind before I going to sleep. For me, music has huge impact on me. It is not just for fun, but for me, music also store my memories in it. You might ask me what is my memories in the Linkin Park songs or Muse songs. Especially, the song of "Undisclosed Desire" by Muse in their latest album. I think some of my friends know it. Hehe ;)

Maybe in the next post, I will tell my opinion about the impact of music in my life. But for the moment, let me conclude this. In conclusion, it was not the limited time I had for not updating my blog, it was more about the feeling and the state of mind that don't motivate me to write anything in my post. So, I like to end this with a line of lyrics from Coldplay that I always play that remind me something.

When you try your best but you don't succeed, When you get what you want but not what you need....